Category Archives: Potty Training

Pitfalls of potty training

Caitlin decided she was ready to do her business in the potty in early February of this year.  Unfortunately because work was driving me insane Caitlin’s potty training took a back seat.  Then summer rolled around and both she and I had ample time on our hands.  It took a little while for her to get back in action but she was a fast learner and soon picked up where she left off.

Potty training this time around is not as annoying as it usually is.  My guess is it is partly due to the fact that I’m not pushing it.  After all Caitlin is not even two yet.  For her to be interested in doing anything in the potty is pretty amazing to me.  So we just go with the flow.  If she tells me she has to go “puppie” then I led her to the toilet otherwise I just let her do her own thing with the occasional reminding question asking her if she needs to go potty.  Whenever she has her accidents (and she has quite a few per day) I just remind her that she needs to do her business in the potty, clean her up, and go about my way.  It’s been a month since we started actively working on her potty training and she has had more successes than accidents.  Which leads me to her latest accomplishment and, to me, a pitfall in potty training:  going in a public restroom.

The family and I were in Target last Sunday when Caitlin started squatting and telling me she had “puppie.”  Assuming that she had gone in her diaper I led her to the restroom to clean her and put on a new diaper.  I laid her on the changing table, took down her shorts, opened up her diaper, and noticed nothing was in there.  There were no poops in her diaper!  That was when I realized that she was holding her poops till she went in the potty.  Afraid that she may let some poops out I frantically took off her shoes and pants, left everything on the changing table (including my purse), and ran to the closest toilet stand.  There wasn’t any toilet seat covers to lie down and I was not planning on putting Caitlin down in order to place some toilet paper on the seat.  I ended up placing Caitlin on the seat and holding on to her so she didn’t fall through.  And there she pooped – in the Target restroom.  I was disgusted and yet so proud that my little girl was getting so good at going in the potty.  I also realized that this won’t be the last of our expeditions to public restrooms.   I just need to figure out a plan of what I’m going to do the next time.  If anybody has some advice I’d love to hear it. 

This picture was taken in early February when Caitlin first started taking an interest with the potty.

caitlinpotty.jpg

One step closer to being potty trained

It finally happened.  On Thursday, October 6, 2008, Mark finally pooped in the potty, and except for the accident he had this afternoon right after he got up from his nap, he has been pooping in the potty ever since. 

I know he has pooped in the potty before, but they were never a bowel cleansing experience and he always ended up finishing his business in the diaper.  In the past months of his potty training he would pee in the potty fine but he had some unknown fear of pooping in the potty.  When he needed to go he would start holding his butt and crying that his butt was hurting.  Eventually, afraid that he may end up giving himself constipation, William or I would give in and put him in a diaper and let him poop in there.

On that eventful Thursday Mark started to do the same song and dance about needing to poop.  This time when I asked him to try pooping on the potty he went willingly and did the deed… and it was a hearty deed!  I started singing and dancing with joy and brought William in to see Mark’s accomplishment.  Even William, who normally has no desire to see such things, was eager to see what Mark produced.  Oh, and Mark was rewarded by getting the “poop” car that William had been taunting him with for the past month.

I don’t know what made Mark get over his aversion to pooping in the potty but both William and I are excited that we are that much closer to having one less child in diapers.  Yay!!!!  😀

Mark on the potty
Mark proudly pooping in the potty

A dropped load

Mark pooped… in the potty!  It happened Friday evening.  He was in a diaper.  I saw him scrunch his face, looking ready to go into a squat.  I asked him if he wanted to poop and quickly lead him to the potty.  He got up as soon as he sat down saying that he did not have to poop.  I reassured him and sat him back on the potty and stood on the sidelines cheering him on.

That is when the magic happened.  It wasn’t the big, “hearty” poop that he usually puts in his diaper, but it was still poop in the potty and an accomplishment for Mark.  I danced and rejoiced.  I told William.  I called my mom and had her congratulate Mark.  I gave Mark a Starburst candy to celebrate and then went to clean up.

Sadly, yet again, I haven’t followed up on his success.  With this major life change coming soon and me trying to prepare for it, I haven’t the time or the desire to be chasing and fighting with Mark to do his business on the potty.  So potty training will have to wait till things have settled down a bit and I have had a chance to catch my breath.

Potty training diary

Pre-training: 

One weekend in early June I caught Mark squatting and looking like he was ready to do some business.  I quickly ushered him into the bathroom and made him sit on the toilet.  A little while later, lo and behold, he had pooped in the toilet.  I was so thrilled.  I rejoiced not only for Mark’s latest accomplishment but also cause I saw this as a sign that he was ready to be potty trained. 

Unfortunately, I didn’t follow up on his achievement immediately.  It took me a couple of weeks before I decided to try potty training Mark.  One Friday evening I decide to let Mark run around without a diaper or underwear.  I just wanted to gauge how much work we had in store.  We had one wetting accident but for the most he was able to pee in the toilet.  The problem was the pooping.  It seems that the time lapse from when he had last pooped in the potty successfully to my initial efforts in potty training had instilled some fear in the little guy.  Towards the end of the night I knew that he had to go really bad.  He was holding his butt as if he was trying to stop anything from coming out.  I tried unsuccessfully to sit him on the potty several time.  He would just cry, saying that it was “yucky,” and get off.  I finally gave up and sat down to have dinner when he runs to me with hands outstretched saying, “I pooped.”  Yes, there was poop on his hands!  Apparently while he was playing on his bed he could not hold it in any longer even though he tried to use his hands to stop the flow.  Thankfully all the waste product was contained on his bed which made for easy clean up. 

Thinking that he may be afraid of sitting on the toilet (yes, I use an infant potty seat on the toilet), I decided to restart his training when the potty chair I ordered for him arrived.

Training: 

Wednesday, July 8:  Potty seat arrives.  It’s a Baby Björn and I’m very happy with it.  Unlike the chairs I have seen at the store, it doesn’t have many parts.  Yet it is big enough for a child to sit in comfortably.  Excitedly, I show the chair to Mark.  He seems interested in it too.  He tries it out and manages to pee while he is on it.  Yay!  That’s a good start.

Thursday, July 9:  When Mark wakes up in the morning I tell him it’s time to begin his “big boy” training.  I take off his diaper and instruct him to go use the potty.  He doesn’t seem as excited about it anymore but he obliges.  For most of the day he goes around without a diaper or underwear (See Aside).  One time he starts crying because he wants to wear his underwear.  Even though I know better, I didn’t want to fight and so I oblige.  Sure enough, not even five minutes go by and he has poops in them.  Great!  I immediately drag him into the bathroom.  As I take off his underwear I state that “poop goes in the potty, you poop in the potty.”  As luck would have it, the poop falls out of his underwear and onto the bathroom rug.  Grrr!  At least that’s easy to clean.  I make him sit on the potty as I go about cleaning up the mess.  The reminder of the day I fight my need to appease his desire to put on underwear.  We don’t have anymore accidents that day.  I put him to bed that night knowing that he is going to relieve himself early the next morning.

Friday, July 10:  Sure enough, he does.  He poops in his diaper just after breakfast and just before I have time to remove his diaper.  Fine!  I clean him and reiterate that “poop goes in the potty, you poop in the potty.”  The rest of the day goes normally with him peeing whenever he is requested to and sometimes on his own accord.  No poop though… at least not until I start cutting the steak for dinner.  That is when I see Mark running down the hallway with poop dropping as he runs.  Not wanting to risk Caitlin getting into the poop (I had a similar situation happen when I was training Aidan except I wasn’t fast enough and I found Mark squishing Aidan’s poop between his fingers), I quickly drop everything and using my one clean hand (the other hand was stained with steak juice) I grab Mark, sit him on the potty, grab Caitlin, put her in the crib, and then I wash up and go about the business of cleaning up Mark’s mess.  So Mark pooped, and yet again. it was not in the potty!  Annoying!  After dinner I put Mark in a Pull-Up (assuming that he is done pooping for the day) and head to the store for some retail therapy.  Not even 15 minutes into our journey he poops again… in the Pull-Up.  Perfect… just perfect!

Saturday, July 11:  Nothing eventful.  Mark pees in the potty but no poops.  By evening time I call it quits for the day; put him in a diaper and head over to MIL.  Sure enough he poops while we are there.  I’m not surprised.

Sunday, July 13:  Peeing same as usual… in the potty.  No pooping in the potty though.  I try several times to sit him on the potty, especially when I see him clutching his butt.  No success.  He just pees and says he is done.  At bedtime, I put Mark in a diaper after his shower.  I know that Mark really has to go and will do so soon, especially now that he is in a diaper.  I ask William to watch him (and take Mark to the potty if he catches him pooping) while I finish getting Aidan and Caitlin dressed.  I walk out to the living room to find William leafing through the Victoria Secret catalog and Mark squatting next to him.  “He is pooping,” I calmly tell William.  William grabs Mark and carries him to the potty but he is too late.  Mark has already relieved himself in his diaper.  Another unsuccessful day.

Monday, July 14:  Day goes by as usual… peeing but no pooping.  We did have one peeing accident today.  Mark was engrossed in his Legos and forgot that he had no diaper or underwear on.  Made him sit on the potty while I cleaned up.  Around bedtime William has an idea.  Put Aidan and Caitlin to bed and wait up with a diapered Mark in our bathroom.  As soon as he looks like he is ready to poop, grab him, take off the diaper, and sit him on the potty.  I’m desperate.  I agree.  After putting Aidan and Caitlin down, I put a diaper on Mark.  William, Mark, and I hole up in the master bath.  Mark is desperate to get out and is going crazy in the cramped space.  After more than 15 minutes in the bathroom with no sign of Mark squatting to relieve himself we open the door and let him hang out in our bedroom playing with his cars.  At one point I think he is going to poop so I immediately move him to the potty only to find out my actions were premature.  The diaper is put back on and let Mark resume playing with his cars.  William and I are both exhausted with our watchdog duties.  Finally, he squats to poop.  We move him to the toilet, but I can’t seem to get the closures of the diaper off.  After much effort I manage to get the diaper off.  Mark has not pooped yet but just as we are about to sit him on the potty, the poop drops… not in the potty but right next to the potty.  In all the commotion to get Mark on the potty in time, Mark ends up stepping on the poop and in an effort to clean himself up he ends up smearing it on his legs.  If he is not already traumatized by the idea of pooping in the potty this event will have definitely done it.  Poor guy.  No poop in the potty again.  Poop next to the potty but no poop in the potty!  I rinse Mark off and send him to bed which he is all too eager to do.

Conclusion:

I was hoping to lay the foundation for Mark’s potty training so that the daycare (he starts July 21) will have something to build on.  Also, I was looking forward to having one less baby’s diaper to change.  I know that Mark can do it.  He has the physical capability to be trained, as evidenced by his ability to successfully pee in the potty and to hold in his desire to poop until he is in a diaper.  He just seems to have a fear of pooping in the potty.  I know that he can do it because he has done it once.  I have no idea what happened since then or what has caused him to have this fear.  When ever I sit him down and try to get him to poop he gets up immediately and cries that it is “yucky.”  Afraid that he is going to make himself sick with constipation I am going to hold back on the poop training.  Since he seems to be doing well with the peeing, I’m still going to let him run around without any bottoms so that he can work on perfecting his new skill.  But as soon I see him clutching his butt, I’m going to get him in a diaper (or a Pull-Up) and let him go about his business.  Hopefully with time, and me using Aidan pooping as an example, I can help him get over his mental insecurity of pooping in the potty.

*Sigh*  Looks like Mark will be in diapers much longer than I had initially hoped for.  Oh well. *Shrug shoulders*

Aside: 

I think this is the best way to start potty training. From past experience I have learned that the minute I put my kids in either an underwear or a diaper they take the opportunity to relieve themselves in it.  Not so bad with a diaper but absolutely gross in an underwear.  So at least for the first week or so, while they are learning to understand their bowel functions, I let them go naked from the waist down.